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Mostrando las entradas de junio, 2024

Loneliness_1

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You can feel lonely surrounded by people Every human being experiences loneliness at some point in their life when they perceive a lack or low quality of their emotional bonds, especially those that are very significant to them. This is experienced as a mixture of anxiety, sadness, and great dissatisfaction and unhappiness. - The most terrible poverty is loneliness and the feeling of being unloved. It is a subjective state, as one can be in the absence of others and if they know and feel that there are people who are attentive to their needs, suffer with their pain, and rejoice in their triumphs, there is no reason for discomfort to exist. - Loneliness is not the same as being alone (It is feeling alone). One can also be surrounded by others, and if the emptiness of the lack of emotional bonds is perceived, suffering appears as an indicator of the discrepancy between current and desired interpersonal relationships. - The opposite of loneliness is not togetherness or a crowd, it is inti

Loneliness_2

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Looking for fish? Don't climb a tree. As proposals for healthy attitudes to overcome loneliness, it is necessary to reflect on what type of bonds are lacking or of poor quality, what is being done wrong, why those desired emotional bonds are not present, how other people have achieved them from similar conditions, what characteristics we would like the people we aim to establish affective relationships with to have, and what can be done to resolve the situation with the resources at hand. - To achieve, organize yourself. It is important to incorporate activities and goals that make one feel useful and good about oneself even in the absence of others, which increases self-esteem, helps break the vicious circle that arises between the deep discomfort caused by loneliness and the ineffectiveness of the procedures aimed at overcoming it, and by beautifying life makes it more attractive to share. - Beautifying life is giving it purpose. (José Martí) - Learn to keep yourself company. To

Jealousy II.

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Some Seek Refuge in a Beehive As a proposal for healthy attitudes towards jealousy, it is important to choose a partner carefully, considering what is known about their habits and the visible part of their behavior, which helps avoid suffering from what one is not willing to tolerate. -   He who marries badly always weeps. -   He who has a bad wife is always startled. -   Beauty without prudence brings trouble to the husband. -   There is no heavier burden than a frivolous woman. Keep in mind that a partner is not a possession and their personal space must be respected. -   Even among the trees in the forest, there must be space. Address any dissatisfaction with the other person's behavior within the framework of mutual respect. -   Not with silence or shouting, but by talking and reaching an agreement. -   Don’t raise your voice, improve your argument. Be systematic with the attention given to prevent gaps that could be exploited by someone else. -   Weapons, women, and books requ

Jealousy I.

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The Partner is Not a Possession Romantic love is generally accompanied by a certain degree of fear of losing the relationship. -   Love without jealousy is not sent from above. -   Love and jealousy are twin brothers. A bit of jealousy can make one feel loved and special, seasoning the relationship when present in the right place, time, and measure. However, jealousy can become pathological and suffocating. -   Whoever marries a jealous person lives in purgatory. -   Jealousy, like salt, enhances the flavor a little but can cause harm in excess. This occurs when jealousy is excessively high, accompanied by great insecurity in one's ability to emotionally retain the other person, unjustified distrust in them and others, and fear of being abandoned and ridiculed. This leads to interpreting any ordinary event in the partner's life as an indication of interest or romantic relationships with others. -   Some see smoke where there's no fire. -   A jealous spouse finds hairs in th

Frustrations II.

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To play and never lose, cannot be. As a proposal for healthy attitudes towards frustrations, it is important to first recognize that one cannot always achieve what one wants, which is an element of tolerance towards these situations. - Adversities are a part of life. - If you don't want to face adversities in life, don't be born. - When going to fight, carry two bags: one for winning and one for losing. - Playing and losing can certainly happen. Every failure is temporary, after which new opportunities always arise. - When one door closes, others open. - God never closes a door without opening two. Failure is an inevitable step on the path to success. - What once felt like a hurricane, we now see as the wind opening new paths. - By making mistakes, we get closer to success. It is also a source of necessary experiences for achieving the maturity that life demands. - He who doesn't fall doesn't get up. - He who hasn't faced trials knows little. (Ecclesiasticus: 34,10)

Frustration I.

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Hitting the Wall with Your Head Won't Make a Hole Frustration arises from suffering over something one desires but has not yet obtained, or has achieved but not in the expected way. In this state, negative attitudes can emerge such as evading responsibilities and blaming others, which makes finding solutions difficult. - A bad dancer blames the floor. Due to an intolerance for pain, an individual may give up and abandon the pursuit of their goal, even when there is still a possibility of achieving it. - Woe to those who cannot bear patiently! What will they do when life tests them? The lack of self-control caused by frustration can lead to unjustifiably attacking others or oneself, which creates new problems. - If you lose your head in difficult situations, you will only make things worse. - He who despairs in trouble only increases it. (Panchatantra) - Despair remedies nothing. One might also, mindlessly, persist in the same ineffective procedures, without any evidence that they w

Authenticity II.

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Finding oneself is never easy. As a proposal for healthy attitudes towards one's own uniqueness, being faithful and consistent with oneself is essential. Within the limits of respecting others' rights and the demands of circumstances, one should be and present oneself as they truly are. - Be yourself and try to be happy, but above all, be yourself. This fidelity and coherence are only possible through the pursuit of intimate and sincere self-knowledge. - Know yourself and be who you are. - Whatever you decide to do in life, make sure it is a projection of your true essence. Achieving this self-discovery is generally difficult. - No journey is longer and harder, although it may seem short and easy, than the one dedicated to finding oneself. - Nothing is closer and harder to see than oneself. - How much work it takes to find oneself! (José Martí) And many times, it is reached after painful existential crises. - Sometimes you have to break to know what you have inside. - Sometimes

Authenticity I.

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We have the right to be different. No one can be exactly the same as another person, not even a twin sibling, because the set of characteristics that individualize each person do not allow it. This is why every human being is unique, unrepeatable, and therefore special. - You are absolutely unique, just like everyone else. - Be yourself, all the other positions are already filled. This uniqueness is due both to the peculiarities of the person and to the circumstances and life demands they must face. - Life is a tough exam; many fail because they try to copy others, not realizing that everyone has a different test. As inappropriate attitudes towards each person's uniqueness, we find: those who impose on themselves ways of being and acting different from the majority, often in trivial aspects, to make themselves appear authentic or interesting. By pretending to be what they really are not, they risk being ridiculous. - As long as we think we are authentic because we pretend to be, we

Sense of Humor

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Don't open a shop unless you like to smile. Homepage  -  Spanish   - Setswana What would human existence, so full of contradictions and problems, be without a sense of humor? Possibly like a world without colors, music, or flavors. This quality consists of the ability to see reality highlighting its comic, cheerful, or ridiculous side. It conveys an optimistic view of life, promotes communication and emotional harmony, reduces tensions that may arise in any type of interpersonal relationship, makes the company of those who have it fun and entertaining, and denotes intelligence, as well as good physical and mental health. It is a refined social skill that is always accompanied by timeliness, authenticity, and sensitivity, without which it degenerates into any of its multiple deviations, among which the following can be mentioned: The lack of humor of the extraordinarily serious whose company is boring. - Distrust the monk and the warrior who never laugh: they take themselves too ser

Tolerance

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Tolerance is a Difficult Learning, but Possible and Necessary Home Page  -  Spanish  - Setswana Every human being has to face, from birth, ways of thinking, feeling, and acting different from their own, so it is necessary to learn to live with diversity, which is a difficult learning, although not impossible. - Tolerance is not innate; it is learned. Inappropriate attitudes towards these differences include seeing them as errors to be eliminated or punished. - To the intolerant, difference is an error, error is a wrong, and wrong must be eradicated. - The intolerant seeks to replicate themselves endlessly by molding the rest of humanity in their image. But this rejection is not genetic; it originates in ignorance of the other, the belief that one holds the only valid perspective of reality and therefore an "absolute truth," and a fear that this truth will be affected by others' differences. - The intolerant doesn't say: "I don't share your opinion," but

Life with Purpose II.

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When someone knows what they want, the universe clears the way. Home - English - Setswana As a proposal for healthy positions, it is important to have achievable goals. - If you know you won't reach the goal, don't start.  - Time should not be wasted attempting what there is ample reason to believe cannot be achieved. (José Martí) Although the fact that most people find it impossible does not mean it truly is. Many people with great goals, who ended up with very successful results, initially lacked the support of their loved ones who did not understand. - Great dreams often seem crazy at first. - It always seems impossible until it's done. - A person with a new idea is a crank until it succeeds. - The impossible recedes when you advance towards it. Goals should provide the feeling of being useful, which means they should contribute to the well-being and happiness of others through products or services. - Seeking joy, I found that life is service. I served and found that ser

Life with Purpose I.

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If you don’t know where you are going, any road will take you there. Home - English - Setswana Goals have a transcendent importance in our lives and are closely related to our well-being and happiness. They are the mental anticipation of the outcome towards which the activity is oriented. - Today's goals determine where you will be tomorrow. - You achieve what you aim for. And the process of achieving them brings about significant changes in each person. - What you get by achieving your goals is often not as important as what you become in the process. Their absence is a major deviation that generates other misdirections and causes discomfort that can become particularly intense, making it incompatible with mental health. - A life without purpose is a premature death. - Not reaching goals causes frustration; not having them causes despair. This condition can lead to vices intended to alleviate the discomfort caused by this void. - He who does not know where he is going ends up anyw