Loneliness_1

You can feel lonely surrounded by people

Every human being experiences loneliness at some point in their life when they perceive a lack or low quality of their emotional bonds, especially those that are very significant to them. This is experienced as a mixture of anxiety, sadness, and great dissatisfaction and unhappiness.

- The most terrible poverty is loneliness and the feeling of being unloved.

It is a subjective state, as one can be in the absence of others and if they know and feel that there are people who are attentive to their needs, suffer with their pain, and rejoice in their triumphs, there is no reason for discomfort to exist.

- Loneliness is not the same as being alone (It is feeling alone).

One can also be surrounded by others, and if the emptiness of the lack of emotional bonds is perceived, suffering appears as an indicator of the discrepancy between current and desired interpersonal relationships.

- The opposite of loneliness is not togetherness or a crowd, it is intimacy.

Intense discomfort produces psychological collapse and disorganization, leading to ineffective actions to establish and consolidate the desired emotional bonds, causing frustration, more discomfort, and psychological disorganization, which makes the actions continue to be ineffective…. And with all this, more of the same is obtained: sinking into emotional isolation.

- Desperation never made good deals.

In this situation, there are misguided attitudes, among which can be mentioned insisting on the same procedures despite their ineffectiveness.

- Stubbornness is the constancy of fools.

- To err is human; to persist in error is foolish.

Trying to attract others with impositions that end up driving them away.

- If you don't like what you're receiving, pay attention to what you're giving.

- You can't force fruits to ripen with a stick.

- If you want to gather honey, don't kick over the beehive.

Seeing the lack of affection as something that has no remedy and resigning oneself to it without doing anything to remedy it.

- He who waits for the fruit to fall into his mouth will have little happiness.

- God gives every bird a worm, but he does not throw it into the nest.

- God gives the nuts, but he does not crack them.

Trying to alleviate the discomfort with the consumption of alcohol or other substances, which creates new problems.

- Sometimes the remedy is worse than the disease.

Sometimes loneliness is experienced as a true social death and loss of the meaning of existence, and suicide is seen as an escape from suffering.

- Tears do not let you see the way.

FINAL CONSIDERATIONS

Every human being experiences loneliness at some point in their life when they perceive a lack or low quality of their emotional bonds, especially those that are very significant to them. Loneliness is a subjective state that is experienced as a mixture of anxiety, sadness, dissatisfaction, and unhappiness. One can be alone without feeling discomfort if they know there are people who are attentive to their needs and share their joys and sorrows. However, one can also be surrounded by people and feel a profound emptiness due to the lack of significant emotional bonds, causing a discrepancy between current and desired interpersonal relationships.

This discomfort can lead to psychological disorganization, resulting in ineffective actions to establish and consolidate desired emotional bonds, perpetuating a cycle of emotional isolation. Ineffective attitudes include persisting in behaviors despite their ineffectiveness, trying to attract others with impositions that drive them away, and seeing the lack of affection as something insurmountable without trying to remedy it. Additionally, trying to alleviate the discomfort with alcohol or other substances can create new problems. In extreme cases, loneliness can be seen as a social death and a loss of the meaning of existence, leading some to consider suicide as an escape from suffering.

Related entries: Loneliness II.

Loneliness I. By Dr. Arturo José Sánchez Hernández.

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